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Who Pays for the Hen Do?
Wondering who pays for the hen do? Find out how costs are usually split and how the bride might contribute to her special celebration.
The Only Hen Party Planning Guide You’ll Need
Have you been tasked with planning the hen party? Whether you’re a seasoned expert or a complete beginner, planning the perfect weekend for the bride-to-be can feel daunting at times, but don’t panic - We’ve got you covered! With our Hen Do Planning Guide, packed full of helpful tips, tricks and information, you’ll become a hen party planning expert in no time!
How to Plan a Hen Party in 9 Steps
Navigate to:
- Speak to your Friends
- Hen Party Guestlist
- Decide the Date
- Budget
- What Location
- What Activities
- Share the Itinerary
- Are you having a Theme
- Extra things to Think about
What is a Hen Party?
A hen party (also known as a hen do, or bachelorette party in the US) is a celebration hosted by the bride-to-be, typically involving her closest friends, family, and colleagues before her big day. It’s usually a long weekend of fun, laughter, and making lasting memories, offering a chance for the bride and her loved ones to enjoy one last celebration before the wedding.
How Hen Parties Began
The roots of the modern hen party can be traced back thousands of years. In Ancient Greece, pre-wedding traditions included offerings to the gods by the bride-to-be, somewhat similar to today's hen parties.
The term "hen party" came into use in the 1800s to describe any all-female gathering. It was first associated with pre-wedding celebrations in The Times in 1976. Hen parties as we know them in the UK became popular in the 1970s during the sexual revolution, often involving fun, cheeky, and sometimes playful public celebrations as the bride transitioned into married life.
1. Speak to your Friends
When planning a hen party, whether it's for the bride or someone else, it's crucial to check in with them first. Find out if they’d like the celebration to be a surprise or if they'd prefer to know what’s coming.
While a hen do is traditionally a surprise, if the person you're planning for deals with anxiety or just isn't a fan of surprises, they might prefer to be in the loop. If they’re up for the surprise, it’s still wise to ask for a list of hard no's, things they absolutely don’t want at the party.
This could be anything from the usual cheeky props to more adventurous activities like zip-lining. We all have our boundaries, so make sure those are respected.
Heres some questions you could ask:
Do you want to stay in the UK or go Abroad?
If the bride’s been dreaming of a sun-soaked weekend in Barcelona, then understand how to plan a hen do abroad is a must. A night in Swansea might not be what she had in mind, so it’s worth figuring out where she’s picturing her perfect hen celebration
What’s your budget looking like?
She'll know her friendship group well, so she’ll have a good idea of what’s affordable based on previous hen parties and getaways. This will help keep things realistic when planning.
What’s your top priority?
Is it a massive local celebration with all her friends or a more intimate, luxe affair with a select few? Figuring out what matters most will help shape the perfect hen do. And if she’s thinking of including her partner, check out this guide to planning a sten do!
What’s on your ‘no way’ list?
This is your “hard no” zone. The hen do is all about celebrating her, not putting her through anything she can’t stand. So, steer clear of anything she’s 100% not up for.
What’s the ideal trip length?
Is it a quick overnight or a proper long weekend getaway? The length of the trip will impact your budget and who can make it, so make sure it aligns with what she’s hoping for.
One big bash or two smaller ones?
If the bride doesn’t want her mum or mother-in-law at the hen party but still wants them to be part of the fun, consider splitting it into two events, one for friends and one for family. Just keep an eye on the budget, as this can add up quickly!
When’s the best time for the hen do?
Planning the hen do around the wedding season is key. If she’s tying the knot in winter but fancies a hen trip in Brighton, it might be best to do it a couple of months ahead for the best weather. And does she need to work around any school holidays or other big dates?
Six weeks before the wedding usually works best, there’s enough time to recover, and the wedding excitement is still building!
2. The Hen Party Guestlist
One of the key parts of hen party planning? Deciding who to invite! To keep things smooth and drama-free, the first step is having a chat with the bride-to-be about who she wants to celebrate with.
It’s also a great chance to figure out who should definitely not make the guest list. During your hen planning stage, there might be certain family members or colleagues she’d rather not have at her last weekend of freedom. Once you've got a list of who to invite to a hen do, run it by her again before you send out those invites to make sure everyone is on the right page!
3. Picking the Date
When planning a hen do, flexibility is nice, but too many options can create chaos.
Sit down with the bride and narrow it down to 2-3 dates that work for her (that’s the most important part, she needs to be there!). Once you’ve got those, send out a quick Doodle Poll to the group with the options.
This method will save you from a flood of replies that go nowhere. If you ask everyone for their availability, you’ll get endless responses, none of which are useful. Keep it simple, show the results to the bride, and let her pick. Sorted!
4. Budget
Run your plan by the hen group with a rough cost for the chosen dates. If most are up for it, you’re good to go! But if you get a lot of “can’t make it,” then it’s back to the drawing board.
For anyone worried about budget, don’t stress, there are loads of ways to keep the hen do special without overspending, see our guide on how to budget for a hen party.
At this stage, if most of the ladies are on board, it’s usually a green light to go ahead. For anyone looking to keep costs down but still join in the fun, consider organising a second, low key event in a nearby town for a more budget friendly option.
Check out our article here where we answer the popular question: Who pays for the hen do?
5. Choosing the Location
Choosing the right hen party destination is a big part of hen do planning and can really set the tone for a memorable celebration. Start by chatting with the bride to get a sense of where she’d love to go.
Consider factors like weather, travel distances, and how much time away works for everyone to help narrow down the options. For example, Spain’s just a few hours away, but a trip to Las Vegas is a serious long-haul commitment.
Then, there’s the budget. While the idea of heading abroad sounds fantastic, it might not fit everyone’s wallet. This is where a hen do planning spreadsheet comes in handy to keep things organised and realistic. And don’t forget—there are loads of amazing spots in the UK that can offer just as much fun without the added cost.
Our Top Choice Hen Party Destinations
UK - Liverpool, Brighton, Cardiff, Bath, Chester
Europe - Albufeira, Barcelona, Amsterdam
6. What Activities To Do?
No hen do is complete without a bit of fun planned in, but let’s keep it realistic, yeah? Time to nail down the activities and maybe even pick a theme for the party!
First thing, don’t over schedule every moment. You’re not running a corporate retreat, so don’t feel like you need to pack in an activity every hour.
Remember, everyone’s here to have a good time, so leave room for people to do their own thing or just have a breather. Trust me, it takes the pressure off you, and gives everyone a chance to enjoy the hen do at their own pace.
Second tip: Always check in with the group about the costs and payment plans. Don’t go booking anything without getting a green light, or you’ll find yourself with a few unhappy faces when it’s time to pay.
For a weekend hen do, try to stick to one key activity a day to keep costs down. A nice dinner and games on the first night, something fun for day two followed by a night out, and a laid-back brunch on the final day works a treat. Remember to check reviews of the activity supplier, see our hens with pens reviews here.
Top Hen Party Ideas and Activities
❤ Life Drawing - Perfect for all the creative hens out there, a life drawing hen do gives you the unique opportunity to learn how to sketch and draw the human body. With a male model to pose for you and an art tutor to lead the session, this is an activity that none of you will forget any time soon… trust us!
❤ Treasure Hunt - Great for those who are up for a bit of exploration, taking on one of our interactive treasure hunts gives you and the girls the chance to bring out your competitive spirits as you compete in teams to complete a range of wacky photo/video challenges and trivia questions, all in an attempt to win as many points as possible!
❤ Cocktail Making - Bring about lots of boozy fun and kickstart your big night out with a mouth-watering cocktail making class! Taking place at a city centre bar, you and the girls will get to take it in turns to make your favourite drinks and play tonnes of hilarious games from start to finish.
❤ Boat Party - A typically European hen party activity, embarking on a boat party during the last weekend of freedom is brilliant for making lasting memories with the girls. After all… what could be better than partying on the Mediterranean with a few cocktails as you watch the sun go down?
❤ Spa Day - Perfect for spending some quality time with the bride and the rest of the hens, a spa day experience gives you the chance to rest, relax and rejuvenate, making it an ideal activity to book the day after a big night out!
❤ Comedy Club - For those of you that love a good chuckle, organising a trip to a nearby comedy club can prove to be a wonderful way to kick off a big night of celebrating with the girls. Who knows... you might even discover your new favourite stand-up comedian!
But remember, you know your friends best, this is just our two cents, so tweak it as needed to suit what your friends would love!
7. Share the Itinerary
It's a good idea to let everyone in on the plan for the hen weekend, especially when they’ve put money into it. Give them a heads-up on what’s happening and when.
You don’t need to go into full detail, just enough to keep everyone clued in. If anyone prefers to be surprised, they’ll have already muted the WhatsApp chat anyway!
Before the hen weekend, send out the full itinerary so guests know what to pack, what activities are planned, and how much downtime they’ll have to explore or relax. It’ll help everyone feel prepared and ready for whatever’s coming next!
8. Setting the Scene for Your Hen Party
Once you and the girls have locked in the destination and activities, it’s time to set the scene for the hen weekend. This is where the fun starts, choosing a theme and picking out accessories to bring it all to life!
Hen Party Accessories
Hen party accessories are a simple way to add a bit of sparkle and personality to the weekend. From quirky sashes to light-up tiaras, these fun extras will make sure you, the bride, and the squad stand out, especially when it’s time for the big night out! Plus, they make great keepsakes to remember the weekend by.
Hen Party Themes
Picking the right hen do theme can really take the hen party from good to unforgettable. Whether you go for something classy and subtle or totally out there, there are endless themes to match every bride's personality.
❤ Choose a Theme Early - Locking in the theme early on gives you time to coordinate everything else—invites, decor, games, activities and even the food and drinks!
❤ Let Everyone Know - Once the theme’s set, spread the word! Whether you send out themed invites or drop a message in the group chat, make sure everyone has enough time to get in the spirit, especially if there's dressing up involved.
❤ Keep it Fun and Flexible - While a theme can make everything more memorable, don’t feel locked into it. Stay open to new ideas and remember that it’s about having fun, not stressing over the details.
Need more ideas? Check out our guide to the best hen party themes!
9. Extra things to Think About
Hen Party Playlist Song Ideas
No hen do is complete without a banging playlist to set the vibe and get everyone on the dance floor! Start with some classic hits like "Dancing Queen" by ABBA or "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls, songs everyone knows and can’t help but sing along to. Don’t forget to throw in a few throwback tunes from the bride’s teen years for a hit of nostalgia.
Mix it up with some current chart-toppers like Dua Lipa's "Levitating" or The Weeknd's "Blinding Lights," and if you're feeling sentimental, throw in a friendship anthem like "You’ve Got a Friend in Me" by Randy Newman. And for an extra personal touch, sneak in the bride’s favourite songs or tracks that have special meaning for your group. With a killer playlist, you’ll keep the energy high all night and create memories that last long after the party's over.
Hen Party Games
Want to add an extra layer of fun to the hen party? Get some hilarious hen party games into the mix! Not only do they bring all the girls together for a laugh, but they’re also a great icebreaker, perfect for hens who don’t know each other too well. Here are a few of our faves to get the party started:
❤ Mr & Mrs Questions – Time to test how well the bride and groom really know each other. Get them to answer as many questions about the other person as possible—it’s always good for some laughs!
❤ Hen Party Dares – Want to spice up the night? Add in some daring challenges to make sure it’s an evening everyone remembers for all the right reasons.
❤ Drinking Jenga – Turn the classic Jenga game into a drinking game. It’s a fun way to kick off the pre-drinks before hitting the bars and clubs. See more drinking hen do games here
❤ Pin the Pants – A hilarious printable game where you grab a blindfold and see which hen can pin the pants on a picture of a hot guy! It's guaranteed to get some laughs.
Hen Do Packing List
Planning the ultimate hen do? To make sure you’re fully prepared for a weekend of fun, we've put together a packing list that covers all the essentials. From outfits and hen accessories to the all important party supplies, we’ve got you sorted. No more last-minute panic, just pack, relax, and get ready for an amazing time with the girls:
1. Comfortable Shoes: Whether you're hitting the dance floor or exploring a new city, comfortable shoes are a must-have to keep you going all day and night.
2. Dressy Outfits: Pack a few glamorous outfits for evening activities. Remember, it's a celebration, so don't shy away from a bit of sparkle!
3. Casual Clothes: For daytime activities or downtime at your accommodation, casual and comfortable clothing is essential.
4. Swimwear: If there's a pool or hot tub at your accommodation or you're heading to a spa for the day, make sure not to forget your swimwear!
5. Accessories: Don't forget your hen party accessories! This could include sashes, tiaras or whatever else fits the party theme.
6. Toiletries: Travel-sized toiletries are perfect for a weekend away. Don't forget essentials like toothpaste, shampoo and shower gel.
7. Makeup & Beauty Products: Whether you're doing your own makeup or getting it done professionally, bring along your favourite beauty products for touch-ups throughout the day.
8. Medication: If you require any regular medication, make sure to pack enough for the duration of the trip.
9. Phone Charger: You'll want to capture all the fun moments on your phone, so don't forget your charger!
10. Snacks: Having some snacks on hand can be a lifesaver, especially if you're staying somewhere remote or are up late.
11. Water Bottle: Stay hydrated throughout the festivities with a refillable water bottle.
12. Travel Documents: If you're travelling abroad, don't forget your passport, travel insurance details, and any other necessary documentation.
13. Money: Bring enough cash or ensure you have access to funds for any unexpected expenses during the trip.
14. Emergency Contacts: Keep a list of emergency contacts, including the accommodation details and the contact information of other party members.
15. A Good Attitude: Lastly, don't forget to pack your sense of humour and a positive attitude. After all, a hen party is all about having fun and creating unforgettable memories!
Further Help and Inspiration
Funny Hen Party Stories
Nothing beats the fun of sharing funny hen party stories once the weekend’s over. Capture all those hilarious moments with photos and videos, you'll be laughing for years to come. These stories often sneak their way into wedding speeches or catch-ups, bringing back memories and creating some solid laughs with your friends.
To make sure those moments are never forgotten, consider putting together a scrapbook packed with photos, ticket stubs, and other little mementoes. It’s a great way to preserve the magic of your hen do, turning it into a keepsake that will keep the good times rolling. So, don’t be shy with the camera, you're creating memories that will go down in history! Planning this in advance is important.
STEN Parties - Everything You Need to Know
STEN parties are the new wave of pre-wedding celebrations, offering a fresh take on the traditional stag and hen dos. Instead of splitting into separate groups, you get to bring the bride, groom, and their mates together for one epic joint celebration. Perfect for couples who share the same friendship circle, a STEN party gives everyone a chance to get involved in the fun.
These inclusive, gender-neutral parties not only break away from the usual gender roles but also give everyone the chance to bond and make memories as a group. It's a fantastic way for everyone to come together before the big day!
Fancy a Life Drawing Hen Do
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Hen Party Themes
Get ready for a memorable hen do with our fantastic range of hen party themes, guaranteed to make your celebration uniquely unforgettable - Take a look!